[Peter Griffin] So we're talkin' about Ezekiel Chapter 5, right? Ok, so the Lord tells Ezekiel to get a sharp razor and shave his head and beard. Then he's gotta divide the hair into three parts and burn one part with fire, strike another part with a sword and scatter the last part to the wind. That's wild! [Cuts to Peter using an electric razor to shave his own head] Oh, man! I just shaved my head like Ezekiel! [Cut to a scene with Stewie Griffin]

[Stewie Griffin] Hey, Ezekiel 5, 5-0! Oh, wait, that's Hawaii Five-O. Never mind. So, then the Lord tells Ezekiel to take a few strands of the hair and tie them in the hem of his garment. He's supposed to do this so he can keep a record of the Israelites' sins. It's like a 'sin-ometer'! [Cut to a scene with Brian Griffin]

[Brian Griffin] So, then the Lord tells Ezekiel to take a few more strands of hair and throw them away into an empty place. And he explains that it's a symbol of how the Israelites' sins will be scattered among the nations. Then, the Lord tells Ezekiel to burn the rest of the hair with fire, and that's a symbol of how he will punish the Israelites for their sins with fire. [Cut to a scene with Quagmire]

[Quagmire] Oh, man, that's intense! So, then the Lord tells Ezekiel to take a third of the hair and strike it with a sword. This is a symbol of how he will punish the Israelites with war and famine. [Cut to a scene with Joe Swanson]

[Joe Swanson] Alright, so, then the Lord tells Ezekiel to take a third of the hair and scatter it to the wind. This is a symbol of how the Israelites will be scattered among the nations, and that he will judge them in the countries where they will be taken. [Cut to a scene with Cleveland Brown]

[Cleveland Brown] And that's the gist of Ezekiel Chapter 5! Man, that was like something out of an episode of Game of Thrones! [Cut to a scene with Lois Griffin]

[Lois Griffin] Well, I think that's the end of Ezekiel Chapter 5! Wow, that was intense! Let's move on to Chapter 6!