Peter: Alright, so what are we summarizing here? Lois: Joshua 1. Peter: Oh, right. So, God tells Joshua that he's gonna take the Israelites into the Promised Land. He tells Joshua to be strong and courageous and not to be afraid. →

Peter: Alright, so this is Joshua 2. So, like, Joshua sends a couple of spies to scope out the land of Jericho. Lois: And then, the spies find out that the king of Jericho was super worried about Israel coming in and taking over, so he orders his people to search for the spies. →

Brian: Alright, so this Joshua 3 guy just tells the people of Israel to get ready to cross the Jordan River. He's like, "You're gonna know it's the right time to go when you see the priests carrying the Ark of the Covenant. →

Peter: Alright, here's the deal: Joshua 4 is all about the Israelites crossing the Jordan river! Lois: Wow, that's a pretty big deal. Peter: Yeah, it's a miracle. God tells Joshua to have twelve men from each of the tribes take one stone from the river and put it in a pile so everyone will remember the miracle. →

Peter: Alright, so this is the chapter when Joshua takes the Israelites to the promised land and then, uh, yeah. Uh, basically, God tells Joshua to make sure his people are circumcised and then they celebrate Passover. →

Peter: Alright, so, in Joshua 6, God helps Joshua and the Israelites take down Jericho. It's like that scene in The Matrix, where Neo says "Dodge this," and then BOOM! Walls come tumbling down. Lois: That's right, Peter. →

Peter: Alright everyone, let's talk about Joshua 7. This is when God tells Joshua that the Israelites have sinned, and they must figure out who did it. Lois: Oh no! That sounds like a big task. Brian: Yeah, and it turns out the culprit was Achan. →

Peter: Alright, so in Joshua 8, God told Joshua to attack the city of Ai. So, like, the Israelites set up an ambush and it worked perfectly. Brian: Wait, wait, so you're telling me God told Joshua to attack a city? What kind of God does that? That's like something out of a video game. →

Brian: Alright, so in Joshua 9, the people of Gibeon hear about all the things that Joshua and the Israelites have been doing and they're like, "Oh no! We don't want to get obliterated like all the other guys!". →

Peter: Alrighty, Joshua 10: Peter: Alrighty, Joshua 10: After Joshua and the Israelites defeated five kings, they were surrounded by their enemies and were scared. So Joshua prayed to God and God made the sun and moon stand still so Joshua and the Israelites could keep fighting. →

Peter: Alright, so in Joshua 11, all these kings from the north got together and attacked the Israelites. Brian: Whoa, sounds like a lot of trouble. Did the Israelites stand a chance? Lois: Well, I guess so, because God was on their side. →

Peter: Alright, so, in Joshua 12, we got a whole bunch of kings getting taken out. Meg: Yeah, like the king of Jarmuth, the king of Lachish, the king of Eglon, and the king of Hebron. Quagmire: Ooh, Hebron! That's where my favorite wine is from. →

[Peter Griffin] Alright, so in Joshua 13, we've got God telling Joshua to divide up the land to the tribes of Israel. [Lois Griffin] But then, God tells him to set aside a portion for the Levites. [Brian Griffin] And to divide up the land of the Reubenites, Gadites, and half-tribe of Manasseh. →

Peter: Alright, so in Joshua 14 we got Caleb saying "My brothers who went up with me made the hearts of the people melt with fear, but I have followed the Lord my God wholeheartedly." Lois: Oh, so he was like a real life Captain America! →

Peter: Alright, so in chapter 15 of Joshua, we've got the borderlines for Judah's land. It starts at the edge of Edom in the south, and then goes up to the Wilderness of Zin in the north. Lois: Wow, sounds like a long stretch of land! →

Peter (as narrator): "In Chapter 16 of the Book of Joshua, we see the tribes of Joseph divided into two: Ephraim and Manasseh. They were given land on either side of the Jordan river, and they built up their cities and towns. →

Peter: Alright, so this chapter starts with Joshua telling the tribe of Manasseh that they're gonna get some land. Lois: That's nice. Peter: Yeah, but it's a lot of land. They basically get the whole western part of the Jordan valley. →

Lois: Alright, this is Joshua 18. Peter: All right, let's start. So, it's about how the Israelites divide the land of Canaan among the seven tribes of Israel. Stewie: (interrupting) Hey, isn't that the same as that movie, "Seven"? →

Lois: "Alright, time for our summary of Joshua 19. So, Joshua divided up the land among the tribes according to their inheritance. Peter: "Right, and there were a lot of them, like the tribe of Benjamin, the tribe of Simeon, and the tribe of. →

Peter: Alright, so this is Joshua 20. Lois: What's it about? Peter: Basically, the Lord tells Joshua to set aside six cities of refuge. Anybody who accidentally kills someone can flee there and find safety. →

Lois: Alright, so this is the summary of Joshua 21. Peter: Yeah... it's like a story of how God gave the Israelites their promised land. Brian: Oh, I get it. Just like how the Cleveland Cavaliers got their promised land when Lebron James came back to the team. →

Peter: Alright, so in Joshua 22, the Israelites just finished conquering the land and they're about to head back to their own land. Brian: Wait, so they conquered the land but then they just said, "Nah, we're good. →

Peter: Alright, so in Joshua 23, God tells Joshua to make sure the Israelites stick to their covenant and follow God's commands. He also reminds them to never worship other gods or make any treaties with the surrounding nations. →

Peter: Alright, so the chapter starts off with Joshua gathering all the tribes of Israel together and reminding them of God's faithfulness. He's like, "Y'all remember when God got you out of Egypt, and then he helped you defeat the kings of Canaan, and then you took all their land?". →