Peter: Alright, so this is Isaiah 1. Lois: What's it about? Peter: Well, God is mad at the people of Israel for their wickedness and all their sacrifices are meaningless to Him. He's like, "Stop offering up sacrifices. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 2 starts off with a prophecy of the mountain of the Lord's house being established as the highest of the mountains and all the nations streaming to it. Brian: Wow, that's pretty cool. →

Lois: Alright, what's the summary for Isaiah 3? Peter: Oh, boy. Uh, let's see here. It says that God is punishing Jerusalem with famine and war, because the people have been wicked. Lois: Wow, that sounds pretty serious. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 4. Let's see here...oh wow, this is a wild one. So basically, the Lord is gonna cleanse Jerusalem and there will be a cloud of smoke or somethin' and seven women will be like, "Oh no, what are we gonna do?!" →

[Peter (as narrator):] So, uhh, this is Isaiah 5. It's all about a bunch of grapes and how bad they are. [Cutaway to Peter talking to Lois] Lois: Peter, what are you talking about? Peter: [confused] Uhh, well, Isaiah 5. →

Peter: "Okay, so Isaiah 6. It starts off with Isaiah seeing a vision of God in his temple. He's like 'Woah! Holy cow! Check out the size of this dude!' Then God is like 'Whatcha gonna do? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!' And then he sends out a bunch of angels to fly around and say 'Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord of Hosts'. →

Peter: Alright, so this Isaiah 7 is all about the prophecy of a young woman giving birth to a son. Lois: Ooh, so it's like that episode of Friends when Rachel had a baby? Peter: Yeah, but there's a lot more to it. →

Peter: Alright, so, Isaiah 8. Meg: Ugh, is this another one of these Bible chapters? Peter: Yeah, I think so. Meg: So boring. Peter: Oh, don't worry, it won't be so bad. It's about a prophecy from Isaiah that God will protect Jerusalem from enemies. →

[Peter Griffin] "Alright, let's see what Isaiah Chapter 9 is all about. The Lord will make a great light in Galilee, and the people that dwell in darkness will see a great light. He will increase their joy and give them peace like a river. →

Peter: Alright, so this is Isaiah 10. Lois: Yeah, and it's all about God's judgement. Brian: Yeah, God's really mad at the wicked people of Israel, and he's going to use Assyria as his weapon. Stewie: Like when they used to send the robots in to fight the Decepticons? →

Lois: So, Isaiah 11, what are we talking about here? Peter: Well, according to the Bible, there will be a shoot that will come out of the root of Jesse. Brian: Wait, like a Jesse shoot from Breaking Bad? →

Peter: Alright, Isaiah Chapter Twelve.... Uh lemme see here. Yeah so here's the deal, it says: "And in that day thou shalt say, O LORD, I will praise thee: though thou wast angry with me, thine anger is turned away, and thou comfortedst me. →

1-16. Peter: Alright, guys. It's time for a summary of Isaiah 13:1-16. Brian: Wow, this is such a classic. Stewie: Is this the one where they make all those terrible predictions? Peter: Yep, it's full of proclamations of doom and gloom. →

[Stewie] Alright, Isaiah 14. Here goes nothin'! [Brian] So what's it say? [Stewie] Well, it starts with the Lord saying that he'll punish Babylon and the king of the Babylonians for their pride. He says Babylon will be destroyed and the king will be brought down to the depths of the earth. →

Peter Griffin: Alright, so Isaiah 15... In the city of Moab, they're gonna have a massive party when they hear how bad the news is for their enemies. They'll make sacrifices and toast their victory! Lois Griffin: Yeah, but then the Lord's gonna cause a lot of destruction and trouble in Moab too. →

Peter: Alright, Brian, this is Isaiah 16. It starts off with the Lord telling Moabites to seek shelter in Judah. Then the Lord says he'll take care of those who oppress Moab and bring peace. Brian: Oh yeah? Sounds like a plan, Peter. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 17... Lois: Wait, is this the one about the mountains and the hills? Peter: Yeah, I think so. Stewie: Wait, I know this one! So, there's a prophecy that says the mountains and hills will become desolate, and all the people in the cities will be destroyed. →

Peter: Alright, so this is Isaiah 18. Meg, you wanna start? Meg: Sure. It's about a message from God sent to Ethiopia. He's like, "Hey guys, I'm gonna bring destruction upon you real soon, so you might wanna prepare". →

Peter: "Hey, Stewie, what's the summary of Isaiah 19?" Stewie: "Well, Peter, Isaiah 19 is all about how Egypt is going to go through a time of trouble and chaos. It's gonna be so bad that everyone will be talking about it, from the palace to the marketplaces. →

Peter: Alright, so what's this one about? Lois: Well, according to Isaiah 20, the Lord tells Isaiah to go and walk around naked and barefoot for three years to represent the Egyptians and Ethiopians who will be taken into captivity. →

Peter: Ok guys, time to talk about the book of Isaiah, chapter 21. Lois: This is going to be a hoot! Brian: I'm ready, let's go! Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 21 is all about a vision of a desert wasteland and a watchman's call. →

Lois: Alright, here's Isaiah 22. Peter: Yeah, it's basically about this guy called Shebna who's been like a big deal in the city of Jerusalem, but then God's like "Hey, Shebna, you're outta here!" and he's like "What? No way!" →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 23... Lois: Is that the one about the sailor and the whale? Peter: No, Lois, that's Jonah and the whale. Isaiah 23 is about the destruction of Tyre. Stewie: Oh, what a shame! Tyre was such a nice place! →

Peter: Alright, Isaiah 24. Let's see what it's about. Lois: Yeah, it's about the Lord punishing the earth for its iniquity. Brian: Whoa, that sounds like the plot of the movie Armageddon. Stewie: Yeah, but with less Bruce Willis and more divine wrath. →

Peter: Alright, let's see what this Isaiah 25 is all about. Lois: Oh, boy. Cleveland: It says that God is going to bring down a wall of protection for his people and there will be singing and joy. Joe: Oh, like that song from The Lion King? →

Lois (reading): Isaiah 26. "In that day this song will be sung in the land of Judah: We have a strong city; God makes salvation its walls and ramparts." Peter: Wait, is this like that game, Wall of Salvation? →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 27 says that one day God is gonna punish the people of Israel and Judah, but then He's gonna forgive them and make them His people again. Brian: And on that day, God's gonna use a giant sword to cut down a tree in the valley of Lebanon. →

[Peter] Alright, so Isaiah 28 starts with a warning about the leaders of Ephraim and the people of Samaria. [Quagmire] Hey, isn't that the city where they filmed the original Superman movie? [Lois] No, Quagmire, that was Smallville. →

Peter: Alrighty, Isaiah 29. God is mad at the people of Jerusalem 'cause they don't listen to Him, so He's gonna send them into exile. Lois: Oh no, that's terrible! Stewie: Wait a second, I thought this was a Bible summary, not a rerun of 'Friends'! →

Stewie: Alright, Isaiah 30. So, God is saying that the people of Judah are gonna get what's coming to them if they keep relying on Egypt for help instead of relying on him. Brian: Yeah, but he also says he'll be there for them if they turn back to him. →

Peter: Alright, Isaiah Chapter 31. Let's see what this one is about. Lois: Oh, it's that one about the people of Judah trusting in a foreign nation for help instead of God, right? Cleveland: Right, and God is like, "Ain't gonna happen. →

Peter: Alright guys, here's a summary of Isaiah 32. We start with God saying that a righteous king will rule the land and make sure justice is served. Stewie: Sounds like a cross between the movie The Dark Knight and the TV show The Good Place! →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 33 - that's a tough one. Um, let's see. Uh, it's kinda like God's talking to the people of Judah, saying 'Oh, don't worry, y'know, I'm gonna make this bad situation good'. Lois: Yeah, but then he's like 'Y'all better watch out, cuz I'm gonna be punishing those who don't follow my rules'. →

Lois: Alright, so what’s going on in Isaiah 34? Peter: Well, apparently God is really mad at all the nations that have been wicked and disobedient. He’s going to punish them all with a big ol’ judgment. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 35, let's see what it's all about. Lois, what did you make of it? Lois: Well, Peter, it's about the Lord bringing joy and hope to the people of Judah. He says that the wasteland will become a paradise, and desert will bloom like a rose. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 36. Lois, you ready? Lois: As ready as I'll ever be. Peter: Alright, so it starts off with King Hezekiah confronting the Assyrian commander, who is demanding Jerusalem surrender. →

Peter Griffin: "Alright, so in Isaiah 37, the King of Assyria sends a letter to King Hezekiah of Judah, bragging about how he's gonna take over and all that. He even threatens to destroy the temple and all that. →

[Peter] Hey, Lois, check out this Isaiah 38. It's about King Hezekiah and his little health hiccup. [Lois] Oh yeah, I heard about that. So, what happened? [Peter] Well, Hezekiah was sick and was at the point of death. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 39. That's the one where King Hezekiah of Judah shows off all his stuff to some Babylonian dudes. Chris: Yeah, and then Hezekiah gets worried that they'll take all his stuff, so he's like, "Don't tell 'em about my stuff, don't tell 'em about my stuff. →

Peter: Alright, Isaiah Chapter 40...”Comfort ye, comfort ye my people, saith your God.” (Peter pauses for a moment, then turns to the audience) Hey, remember when Meg tried out for that singing contest and got booed? That was a real bummer. →

Peter: Alright folks, time for our Bible Summary of the Day. This time, we're talking about Isaiah 41. Lois: Oh, this one is so exciting! God is saying that he's chosen the Israelites to be his people and he'll always be with them, no matter what. →

Peter: Alright, so this chapter is Isaiah 42, and it's all about how God chose this one servant to bring justice to the nations and restore Israel. Lois: So, he's like, a superhero? Peter: Kinda. God also says he won't be shouting or raising his voice, or anything, but that he'll be a gentle light to the nations. →

Narrator: Previously, on Family Guy... Peter: Alright, let's get started on Isaiah 43. Lois: Uh oh, here we go again. Peter: Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, God is telling His people that He is the only one who can rescue them and save them from their enemies. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 44 is about God's chosen people, Israel. He promises to protect and provide for them, and says that anyone who doesn't believe in Him will be burned up like a tree. Lois: Wow, that's harsh. →

Peter: Alright, let's see what we got here.... Isaiah 45. Alright, it's sayin' that God's gonna create a new heaven and a new Earth and that he's gonna make everything right and perfect. Lois: Yeah, but he's also gonna do something else. →

Lois: Alright, so what's happening in Isaiah 46? Peter: Oh, you know, the usual. God is super mad and wants to show off his awesomeness. Kinda like when I'm at the Quahog Clam Festival and I show off my beer-drinking skills. →

Peter: Alright, so, Isaiah 47...Lois, why don't you start us off? Lois: Sure thing, Peter. So, Isaiah 47 talks about Babylon's downfall. It says that the Lord will humiliate Babylon and send its citizens away into exile. →

[Peter Griffin, in a loud and gruff voice] Alright, Isaiah 48... It's all about the Lord admonishing his people, the Israelites, for their disobedience. He says they should have known better and that he's been warning them all along. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 49 is about God comforting the Israelites, right? Lois: Yep. God is basically telling them that even though they've been exiled, they still have hope. Cleveland: Yeah, and the Lord is like, "I'm gonna do something special with you guys! I'm gonna make you like a sharp arrow, with a polished shaft!" →

4-9. Lois: Okay, let's see what we got here for Isaiah 50:4-9. Peter: Oh great, another one of these Bible chapters. I always have trouble following them. Lois: Well, it's easy enough. It starts off with the Lord speaking to His people, saying, "The Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 51. Lois, this one's about how God is with us through all our trials and tribulations. Lois: Okay, so like when we were trying to find a good dry cleaner? Peter: Not quite, but close. →

Peter: Alright, so this Isaiah 52 thing is pretty wild. We got God's people, the Jews, who were exiled and they're gonna get to come home. Lois: Wow, that's so cool! Brian: Yeah, and there's this messenger who is announcing their return and it's beautiful and majestic. →

Lois: Alright, so what's this one? Peter: Isaiah chapter 53! Cleveland: Oh, I know this one! It's about, like, a suffering servant or something? Quagmire: A suffering servant? Sounds like a supporting character on a medical drama. →

Peter: Alright, this is Isaiah 54. So, uhh, let's see here. Right, so God is basically saying not to be afraid because He's gonna give His people a new home. He's gonna make it all better and create a huge new place for everyone to live. →

Peter: Hey, Lois, what chapter of the Bible are we gonna cover today? Lois: Let's talk about Isaiah 55. Brian: Oh, great. That's one of the most important chapters in the Bible. Stewie: Ugh, why do we have to keep doing this? Can't we just watch an episode of SpongeBob and call it a day? →

Peter: Alright, so this is Isaiah 56. According to the Bible, it says God will bring good fortune to foreigners who keep his Sabbath and they can join His house of prayer. Lois: Oh, that's nice. Stewie: Ugh, why do we have to talk about God all the time? Can't we talk about something more interesting, like that new Avengers movie? →

Peter: Alright, so this is Isaiah 57. It says, "The righteous perish, and no one takes it to heart; the devout are taken away, and no one understands that the righteous are taken away to be spared from evil. →

Peter: Hey Lois, what do ya got there? Lois: It's Isaiah 58, Peter! It's from the Bible! Peter: Oh, like that show on HBO with the dragons? Lois: No, Peter, this is about how God wants us to act. He wants us to help the poor, the hungry, the strangers, and the homeless. →

Peter: Alright, Isaiah 59: It starts off by saying that the Lord's hand ain't short, which I guess is a good thing. Lois: Then it says that God's ears ain't deaf, which, you know, I'm sure He appreciates. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 60. Uh...It's all about the light of God shinin' down on the people of Jerusalem. Ya know, like when I've had too many beers and I'm tryin' to find the bathroom. Lois: (Rolls her eyes) Peter, that's not what it's about at all. →

Cleveland: Alright, guys, it's time for Isaiah 61. So, the Lord has anointed us to preach good tidings to the meek, to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to captives, and to open the prison to them that are bound. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 62. Uh, let's see. It's about the city of Jerusalem, and how it's gonna be saved, and how great it's gonna be. Lois: Yeah, I think it says something about how the city will be renamed, too. →

7-64:12 Peter: Alright, so, Isaiah 63:7-64:12 is about God coming to save his people. Lois: Oh, like the scene in The Avengers where Iron Man saves the day? Peter: Yeah, kinda like that. God is like, "I come to save you with a strong hand and an outstretched arm. →

Peter: Hey Brian, whatcha readin'? Brian: Isaiah 64, Peter. It's about God's people crying out to Him to save them from their enemies. Peter: Yeah, that sounds awesome. But, like, did all this happen in the 80s? →

(Stewie) Peter, have you read Isaiah 65? It's a real eye-opener. (Peter) Yeah, sure. What's it about? (Stewie) Well, it starts off with God talking about how He is sick of Israelites worshiping false gods and neglecting Him. →

Peter: Alright, so Isaiah 66! This is about God's judgement and how He will bring peace to the world. Basically, God is gonna judge the wicked and reward the righteous. He's like a heavenly judge dredd, ya know? →