Peter: Alright, so Deuteronomy 24. Here we go. So, uh, the Lord says, 'A man who has recently been married shall not go out into battle, or be held responsible for any public business; he must be free at home for one year, to bring happiness to the wife he has married.'

Lois: Yeah, so husbands, keep that in mind.

Stewie: What if his wife is a dragon? That would put a damper on all the happiness.

Brian: So, then it says, 'You must not take the upper or lower millstone in pledge, for that would be taking a person's life in pledge.'

Peter: Whoa, that's a bit harsh.

Lois: What does that even mean?

Stewie: It means if you borrow something from someone, you better give it back or else you'll be in real trouble. Like if you borrow a DVD from a friend and then you don't give it back, it's like you're taking their life in pledge.

Brian: Wow, okay. So, then there's this part about mistreating slaves: 'You must not take advantage of a hired worker who is poor and needy, whether that worker is a fellow Israelite or a foreigner living in one of your towns.'

Peter: Ah, okay, so don't mistreat the help. Got it.

Lois: Alright, then it says, 'If you see the donkey of someone who hates you fallen down under its load, do not leave it there.'

Stewie: Oh, so you have to be a good Samaritan even to people who don't like you.

Brian: Yeah, and then it goes on to talk about how you must be fair and honest in business dealings, and how you must pay people on time.

Peter: Alright, so the moral of the chapter is: be kind to everyone, even if you don't like them, and don't be a deadbeat.

Lois: Yeah, that's pretty much it.

Stewie: Alright, I think I'm gonna go watch The Little Mermaid.