(Peter, speaking to the rest of the family)

Okay, so in Matthew 25, Jesus tells a parable about three virgins who have lamps and oil. They all fall asleep and then the bridegroom shows up, and the ones who have enough oil for their lamps are allowed to enter the wedding banquet. The others are left outside, and Jesus says the lesson is to be prepared, 'cause you never know when the bridegroom's gonna show up - kinda like the ending of The Sopranos. Anyway, then Jesus talks about how we should treat the least of these, like the strangers, the hungry, the thirsty, and the sick, and it's kinda like an episode of ER. And then He finishes by saying that when He returns, He's gonna judge us based on how we took care of these people, so we better watch out like in that scary movie The Ring. That's Matthew 25!