Peter: Alright, so in this chapter of the Bible, 2 Samuel 21, David and the people of Israel are dealing with a famine. So David goes to ask the Lord what to do and the Lord says the famine is because of Saul and his bloodline.

Lois: So David goes to the people of Jabesh Gilead and they give him the bones of Saul and his sons, which he then buries in the tomb of Saul's father.

Brian: So David then makes a deal with the Philistines and they give him seven of their descendants and David hands them over to the Gibeonites to be killed.

Stewie: But then the people of Israel get angry and they start to stone David, so he has to go to a cave to hide. Then the Lord sends a giant to attack the Philistines and David defeats him by using a slingshot, in a scene that's almost as cool as when Luke Skywalker destroyed the Death Star.

Quagmire: Alright, so then David and the people of Israel make a peace treaty with the Philistines and David is able to live in peace. The end.