Peter: Alright, kids, let's get this Bible summary started! So, Proverbs 8 is about wisdom, and it's personified in a woman called Lady Wisdom.
Lois: Ooh, sounds like some sultry business!
Brian: Lady Wisdom is a pretty wise lady, and she's telling everyone to come and get some of that knowledge.
Stewie: Yeah, like, if you don't take the wisdom, you're gonna be so sorry!
Peter: Also, she created the world, and even predates the mountains.
Chris: Wow, that's like, really old, right?
Peter: Yep. She's like the original OG!
Lois: Alright, moving on. Lady Wisdom also brings wealth and honor, as well as righteousness.
Brian: Yeah, so if you follow her teachings, you'll have a good life.
Stewie: And if you don't, you'll be like, so uncool!
Peter: Right. Lady Wisdom is also the one who understands the deep mysteries of God.
Chris: That's like, totally deep, man!
Lois: Alright, I think that's enough for Proverbs 8. Any last comments?
Peter: Yeah, Lady Wisdom is like Yoda, she's got all the answers.