Listen, Jack, here's the deal. My father used to say that when the Lord was ready to make a covenant with his people, Moses went up to Mount Sinai with Aaron, Nadab, Abihu and seventy of the elders of Israel. Then they saw God, and they ate and drank.

Now, folks, I'm not joking, God said to Moses, "Come up to me on the mountain and stay here, and I will give you the tablets of stone with the law and commands I have written for their instruction."

So Moses went up with Aaron, Nadab and Abihu, and seventy of the elders of Israel, and they saw the God of Israel. Under his feet was something like a pavement made of sapphire, clear as the sky itself.

C'mon, man, no malarkey! Then God said to Moses, "Come up to me on the mountain and stay here. I will give you the stone tablets with the law and commands I have written for their instruction."

Excuse me, but it gets better. Moses wrote down all the words of the Lord. Then he and Joshua son of Nun and the elders of Israel went up on the mountain, and they saw the God of Israel.

See here, Jack, and I'm not making this up: the Lord was on the mountain, surrounded by a blazing fire. He spoke with Moses face to face, as a man speaks with his friend. Then Moses returned to the camp with the elders of Israel.

What was that? Oh, yeah, then Moses and Aaron, Nadab and Abihu, and the seventy elders of Israel went up, and they saw the God of Israel. Under his feet was something like a pavement made of sapphire, clear as the sky itself.

And I tell you what, when they looked upon God, they ate and drank. Then the Lord said to Moses, "Write down these words, for based on all these words I have made a covenant with you and with Israel."

Literally, or uh, you know, no malarkey. That's Exodus 24. Not gonna happen again any time soon.