Good evening, and welcome to Weekend Update.

This week on the Bible, we take a look at Deuteronomy 19. In this chapter, God tells the Israelites to set up three cities of refuge for those who have accidentally killed someone. He also says that anyone who knowingly murders someone should be put to death. Finally, God instructs the Israelites to be honest when testifying in court, and to avoid perjury.

So there you have it, folks! Remember, if you accidentally kill someone, there are three cities of refuge just waiting for you. And if you murder someone on purpose, well, then you can look forward to an eternal stay in a much hotter place. This has been Weekend Update. Goodnight!