Listen, Jack, here's the deal. Leviticus 16 gets right to the point - it's a big day in the lives of the Israelites. My father used to say that every year, on the tenth day of the seventh month, they'd have to come together, and I'm not joking, it was a big deal. They'd bring two goats and a ram, see here, Jack, and the high priest would enter the tabernacle and do his work. He'd make a sin offering, and a burnt offering, and a guilt offering, and then he'd take the goats, literally, and place them in front of the Lord. One of the goats would be chosen as the scapegoat, and the other would be slaughtered. C'mon man, this is serious stuff! The high priest would then take the goat's blood and sprinkle it on the mercy seat and the altar, and then he'd make a special offering for the people. No malarkey! Now, what was that? Oh, yeah - the scapegoat! The high priest would take the scapegoat and lay his hands on it and confess all the sins of the people. Then, he'd send the goat into the wilderness, and all the sins would be carried away. That's it, folks. Or uh, you know, not quite - he'd then take the ram and sacrifice it, and then the people could go home and celebrate. That's the deal - no ifs, ands, or buts. Not gonna happen.