Well, folks, it's Revelation 8, and it's a doozy. We open with seven angels getting ready to blow seven trumpets. Don't worry, there's no chance of a fifth-grade dance-off. But the trumpets do release a bunch of plagues, like a third of the sea turning to blood and a third of the stars in the sky falling to Earth. It's enough to have you wishing you'd taken those night classes in Astronomy. But don't worry, the plagues don't stop there: the oceans and rivers are all poisoned, and the Earth is scorched by fire. You'd think that would be enough to make people change their ways, but nope. They still stay on the same wicked path. But don't worry, folks, there's still a happy ending in the next chapter.