"Listen up, maggots! This is Revelation 8, and it's all about a big ol' angel with a TRUMPET. That's right, a TRUMPET! This angel's gonna blow it, and then there'll be some hailstones, fire and blood that'll rain down on the earth. Then, two more angels with TRUMPETS will come and cause even more destruction. Finally, a third angel will show up and start to do some serious damage with his TRUMPET. Now get movin' and learn this chapter!”