Folks, here's the deal. You know, my father used to say that if you want something done, you'd better do it yourself. Well, that's what Abimelech did. See here, Jack, Abimelech was the son of Gideon and he thought it was high time that he was king of Shechem, so he basically killed all of his brothers and became the ruler. Now, uh, you know, that didn't really sit well with the citizens, so they got angry and asked why he did it. Abimelech said it was because they wanted him to be king, but that was no malarkey. C'mon, man, they were just trying to protect their freedom. Anyway, things got really bad and the citizens asked God for help, and God sent a prophet to talk to Abimelech. The prophet basically said, "Listen, Jack, you can't do this. It's not gonna happen." But Abimelech didn't listen. He was determined to be king. So, what was that? God sent a spirit to cause a civil war between the citizens and Abimelech and his men, and Abimelech was killed. Literally. So, I tell you what, if my father taught me anything, it's that you should never try to take something that isn't yours. Excuse me. I'm not joking.