Listen, Jack. Folks, here's the deal. This chapter of the Bible is pretty wild. What was that? We got a Levite and his concubine. Now, the concubine runs away, and the Levite goes to retrieve her. C'mon, man. He goes to a place called Gibeah. So, he goes to a man's house there and he's like, "I need a place to stay." And the man's like, "You can stay here, no malarkey!" So, the Levite goes in and he's like, "Hey, what's up? Give me some food and I'll be cool." And the man's like, "Excuse me, I got nothing. You can't stay here, literally."
But then, he's like, "Hold up, I got an idea. You can stay with my daughter. My father used to say, if you're gonna stay with someone, stay with my daughter." So, the Levite stays with the daughter, and then some wicked men come and they're like, "Give us the dude!" And the man's like, "No way, not gonna happen." So, they start to break down the door and the Levite pushes his concubine out the door and they rape her all night. I'm not joking.
So, the Levite cuts her up into 12 pieces and sends them around the country. He's like, "Hey, this is what happened to my concubine." And then, all the people of Israel are like, "See here, Jack! This is crazy. We must do something about this." So, they go to war and they kill all the wicked men, and the Levite and his concubine live happily ever after. That's the Bible for you, folks. Or uh, you know, that's the end of Judges 19. I tell you what, you can't make this stuff up.