Listen, Jack, here's the deal: Gideon is a man of Israel who is, literally, kind of a nobody. He's out there, trying to harvest wheat in a winepress to hide it from the Midianites (that's a big no-no, by the way). But then, Gideon gets a visit from the Lord—the guy who made the world and everything. He tells Gideon to go and lead the army of Israel against the Midianites and save the country. Gideon is like, c'mon man, I'm just a nobody, but the Lord says, no malarkey! I'm sending you.

So, Gideon does what he's told, and he's like, okay, I need a sign that you're with me and you'll help me. So the Lord puts fire on a rock, and then he sends Gideon on his way. Gideon goes, gathers the Israelites together, and then he does this crazy thing—he tears down a statue of Baal that his father had made. That's a bold move, folks!

Anyways, Gideon rallies the troops, and then he does this crazy thing—he has them all grab a trumpet and a torch and a pitcher and then break those pitchers. It's literally the craziest thing you ever saw. Then, Gideon and the Israelites jump out and start attacking the Midianites and they win!

My father used to say, if you're going to do something, you have to do it with style. Well, Gideon did it with style! He literally scared the Midianites out of the country and saved the day. See here, Jack, you gotta believe in yourself. Not gonna happen that you can't do it. I tell you what, I'm not joking—Gideon was a real hero. Excuse me, what was that? Oh, right, the Bible. Well, it's a great book—you should read it!