Folks, here's the deal. Listen, Jack, Jephthah was a brave man, he was a real hero. He was an Israelite, and was the son of an Israelite woman and a Gileadite man. He was a judge of Israel. I'm not joking, he was a bad dude.

Anyway, Jephthah had an issue with the Ammonites. Seems there was a land dispute and the Ammonites were trying to take Israel's land. I tell you what, Jephthah wasn't gonna let that happen, no malarkey! So he goes and talks to the Ammonites, and they're like, "You have to pay tribute to us, or else." And Jephthah's like, "Or else what?" See here, Jack, and the Ammonites are like, "Or else we fight."

So Jephthah, he's brave and all, and he's like, "Literally, if we fight, the Lord will deliver the Ammonites into my hands." And what was that, the Ammonites didn't believe him and they attacked. My father used to say, "Never fight a losing battle," but Jephthah was smart, and he beat the Ammonites.

Anyway, then Jephthah made a vow to the Lord. See here, Jack, he said that if the Lord gave him the victory, he'd sacrifice the first thing that came out of his house. Excuse me, his daughter was the first thing that came out of the house, so he had to keep his promise. Or uh, you know, he sacrificed her anyway. I'm not joking, it's in the book.

Anyway, the moral of the story is, c'mon, man, don't make promises you can't keep, 'cause it's not gonna happen. That's Judges 11, folks.