• King James Version

    1. Also, thou son of man, prophesy unto the mountains of Israel, and say, Ye mountains of Israel, hear the word of the LORD: / 2. Thus saith the Lord GOD; Because the enemy hath said against you, Aha, even the ancient high places are ours in possession:

  • Norm

    Ezekiel 36: So God says, "I'm gonna take the Israelites back to their land," and then he does it. He's all like, "Hey, I'm gonna cleanse you, and give you a new heart and a new spirit, and you're gonna live there forever and ever.

  • Joe Rogan Experience

    Joe: Alright, so I’ve got (Bible Expert) with me right now and we’re talking about the book of Ezekiel, chapter 36. What’s going on in this chapter? Bible Expert: Well Joe, chapter 36 is a prophecy of hope.

  • Jeopardy

    Alex Trebek: So, what do you do for a living? Contestant: Well, I'm a Bible student and I'm currently studying Ezekiel 36. Alex Trebek: [Sigh] What does this chapter say? Contestant: Ezekiel 36 is all about God's promise to restore the Israelites to their homeland, despite their difficult exile.

  • Drill Sergeant

    HEY YOU NO GOOD MAGGOTS! YA'LL BETTER START PAYIN' ATTENTION! THIS CHAPTER'S ABOUT PROMISES FROM GOD TO THE ISRAELITES. HE'S GONNA GIVE 'EM A NEW HEART AND A NEW SPIRIT, GONNA MAKE 'EM BETTER THAN WHEN THEY STARTED.

  • Batman

    Batman: Robin, I believe our mission today is to summarize Ezekiel 36. Robin: Holy Summarization, Batman! Batman: Indeed, Robin. Let us begin. God says that He will give the people of Israel a new heart and a new spirit and that He will take away their stubborn and rebellious hearts.

  • Joe Biden

    Folks, here's the deal. See, in Ezekiel 36, God promised to give the people of Israel a new heart and spirit and to bring them back to their homeland. Now, listen, Jack - this is no malarkey! It's literally a promise of a new life for them, and I tell you what - my father used to say that it was a sign of God's amazing love for His people.

  • Donald Trump

    God is AMAZING! He has promised to restore the people of Israel, and this chapter is about that promise. God is gonna make Israel great again! He is gonna bring His people back to their homeland, and He is gonna give them a new heart and a new spirit.

  • Family Guy

    Peter: Alright, so Ezekiel 36 is all about God's promise to the Israelites that they will be restored to their homeland. Lois: That's right, Peter. God tells them not to be discouraged because He will restore them and make them prosperous.