Alex Trebek: Alright, let's move on to the next contestant. Tell us a little bit about yourself!

Contestant: Well, Alex, I actually have a great deal to say about the Bible! Specifically, Deuteronomy 25.

Alex Trebek: Uh oh, here we go again. Alright, what does it say?

Contestant: Well, it starts off by reminding the Israelites that they should not have different weights or measures when trading. It then goes on to say that if a married man dies without children, his brother should marry the widow and they should have a child together. The firstborn son of this union should get the inheritance of the deceased brother. It then goes on to say that if a man beats his male or female slave, he should be punished. Finally, it stresses the importance of wiping out the memory of Amalek and the importance of justice and restitution.

Alex Trebek: Ugh, okay. Can we move on to something else? Maybe... sports?