• King James Version

    1. And when David was a little past the top {of the hill}, behold, Ziba the servant of Mephibosheth met him, with a couple of asses saddled, and upon them two hundred {loaves} of bread, and an hundred bunches of raisins, and an hundred of summer fruits, and a bottle of wine.

  • Norm

    So, in 2 Samuel 16, David is on the run, and he's not alone — he's got a crew of his own, including a guy named Shimei, who's throwing some serious shade at the king. David is like, 'whatever, dude', but then Absalom, David's own son, shows up and starts talking some serious trash.

  • Joe Rogan Experience

    Joe: Alright, chapter 16 of 2 Samuel. What's happening in this chapter? Bible Expert: Well, the chapter starts with David being pursued by his son, Absalom, who is trying to take over the throne. David and his followers are in a state of distress and despair as they flee from Absalom.

  • Jeopardy

    Alex: Alright, so what do you do for a living? Contestant: Well, I'm a biblical scholar, and I focus on a book called the Bible. Alex: [sighs] Okay, so what's the Bible all about then? Contestant: Well, 2 Samuel 16 is about a man named Shimei who is from the tribe of Benjamin and he curses King David as he is fleeing Jerusalem.

  • Drill Sergeant

    Alright, listen up and listen good! This is 2 Samuel 16. So, King David's been betrayed by his son Absalom and is running away from Jerusalem. David's got his loyal troops with him, but they run into a bunch of unhelpful people who badmouth him.

  • Batman

    [Scene: Batman and Robin are standing at the entrance to the Batcave] Batman: Greetings, old chum. It appears we have a new case on our hands. Robin: What is it, Batman? Batman: It concerns the Book of 2 Samuel, Chapter 16.

  • Joe Biden

    Listen, Jack. Here's the deal. I'm not joking. My father used to say, it's not what you know, but who you know, especially when you're faced with adversity. Well, there was plenty of adversity in 2 Samuel 16.

  • Donald Trump

    2 Samuel 16 was a HUGE chapter! It tells a sad! story of King David, who was betrayed by his son Absalom. Absalom was a low-energy loser who had been stirring up trouble and trying to overthrow his daddy.

  • Family Guy

    Peter: OK, so the chapter starts off with this dude Shimei, who is cursing King David and throwing rocks at him and his followers. He's like "You deserve this, David, you killed Saul and his son!" Lois: Wow, that's harsh.