"ATTENTION! Listen up, maggots. Now you're gonna get a crash course in 1 Corinthians 7. This chapter is all about marriage and singleness. Paul says that it's good for folks to stay single, but if they can't control themselves, they should get married. Marriage is to be a lifelong commitment, and couples should not break it. Paul also talks about how husbands and wives should remain faithful to each other. No funny business! He also says that if one partner is a Christian, that partner shouldn't leave the other partner, even if they're not a Christian. Got it? Good. Now move it!"