1. And again he entered into Capernaum after {some} days; and it was noised that he was in the house. / 2. And straightway many were gathered together, insomuch that there was no room to receive {them}, no, not so much as about the door: and he preached the word unto them. →

Well, welcome to another edition of Weekend Update! This week, let's take a look at the Bible, particularly Mark 2. We got Jesus healing a paralytic, and then a bunch of religious guys getting mad at Him for doing it on the Sabbath. →

Joe: Alright, so what's going on in Mark 2? Bible Expert: Well, Jesus is continuing to heal people and perform miracles throughout the region. He heals a paralytic, who is lowered down to Jesus through the roof of the house. →

Alex Trebek: So, contestant, what have you been up to lately? Contestant: Well, I've been reading the Bible, and I just finished the second chapter of the Gospel of Mark. Alex Trebek: Ah, that's nice. →

Listen up, maggots! This is Mark 2. In this chapter, Jesus shocks everyone by forgiving the sins of a paralyzed man. He tells the man he is healed, then orders him to rise up and walk. The man does, and everyone is shocked. →

Batman: Robin, what have we here? It looks like Jesus is healing a man with palsy. Robin: Wow Batman, that's incredible! He's even forgiving the man his sins! Joker: Oh ho ho, this is too much! This Jesus fellow is really shaking things up! →

Listen, Jack, here's the deal. This chapter is all about Jesus doing some pretty incredible stuff. Literally, he is like a superhero! He heals a guy who is paralyzed. No malarkey! Then, he says some stuff about how it's easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God. →

Today, I read Mark 2 and it was unbelievable. We had so much winning. We had the amazing Jesus back in action after being gone for a while. He is healing the sick, which is tremendous. He even healed a man's paralysis! Low energy people said it couldn't be done, but Jesus showed them otherwise. →

Peter: So, Mark 2. Jesus is healing a Paralytic, right? Stewie: Yes, that's right Peter. He's doing it in a house, and the crowd is so big they can't even get in the door. Brian: So they take the Paralytic and lower him through the roof! →