Alex Trebek: "Well, tell us a bit about yourself, what do you do for a living?"

Contestant: "Well, I'm an avid Bible student and I've been studying 2 Samuel 8 recently."

Alex Trebek (clearly frustrated): "Okay, so what's 2 Samuel 8 about then?"

Contestant: "Alright. 2 Samuel 8 tells the story of King David's military victories over the Philistines, Ammonites, Moabites, and Edomites. He defeats them all, and then brings back a great deal of spoils from the battles. He then dedicates the spoils to the Lord in thanksgiving for the victories."

Alex Trebek: "That's great, now, what about your hobbies? What do you like to do in your free time?"

Contestant: "Well, I also like to study the Bible. I'm currently studying 2 Samuel 9 which talks about how King David shows kindness to Mephibosheth, the son of his late friend Jonathan."

Alex Trebek (rolling his eyes): "Right. So what's 2 Samuel 9 about then?"

Contestant: "It tells the story of how King David shows kindness to Mephibosheth, the son of his late friend Jonathan. He gives him a place at his table and promises that he and his descendants will always have a place in David's house."

Alex Trebek (looking exasperated): "Okay, great. Now, what about your favorite sports team?"

Contestant: "Well, I'm a big fan of the Bible, so I'm currently studying 2 Samuel 10. It tells the story of how David defeats the Ammonites and Arameans who had been harassing the Israelites. He then shows mercy to the King of Ammon, and assigns Joab and his troops to restore order to the region."