Alex Trebek: So, what do you do for a living?

Contestant: I'm an avid reader of the Bible! I recently read the book of Numbers.

Alex Trebek, rolling his eyes: Oh, great. Alright, so what's in Numbers 9?

Contestant: Numbers 9 is all about the Israelites preparing to leave Mount Sinai and enter the Promised Land. God told Moses to take an account of the people and have them prepare for the journey. He also instructed Moses to have a special cloud hovering over the people by day and fire by night to guide them on their journey.

Alex Trebek, sighing: Anything else?

Contestant: Yes! God gave instructions for the Passover—the Israelites were to sacrifice a lamb, roast it, and eat it with bitter herbs and unleavened bread. The Lord also commanded that the people observe the Feast of Unleavened Bread and the Feast of Firstfruits.

Alex Trebek, trying to contain his frustration: Is that it?

Contestant: Not quite! God also gave instructions on how the people were to respond to the offerings that were brought to Him. The Lord also instructed Moses to appoint specific men to oversee the building of the tabernacle. Finally, the Lord issued a law that all males of the Israelites must be circumcised in order to be able to participate in the Passover.

Alex Trebek, gritting his teeth: ...Right. Let's move on to something else, shall we?