1. Woe to the bloody city! it {is} all full of lies {and} robbery; the prey departeth not; {bloody...: Heb. city of bloods} / 2. The noise of a whip, and the noise of the rattling of the wheels, and of the pransing horses, and of the jumping chariots. →

So folks, it's time for a special edition of Weekend Update from the Book of Nahum. Chapter 3 says that Nineveh, the capital of Assyria, is going to be destroyed by God. They've been pretty nasty to God's people, so it's about time. →

Joe: Alright so what’s going on with Nahum 3? Bible Expert: Well, the chapter talks about Nineveh—the capital of the Assyrian Empire. It’s a really powerful city and it’s going to be completely destroyed because of their wickedness. →

Alex Trebek: Alright, so tell me a bit about yourself. Contestant: Well, I'm a big fan of the Bible and I'd like to summarize Nahum 3 for you. Alex Trebek: [Sighs] Umm, well, why don't you tell me about your hobbies? →

Listen up, maggots! Nahum 3 is all about the punishment God has in store for Nineveh, the capital of Assyria. God's gonna punish 'em for their wickedness and cruelty. He's gonna send a horde of enemies to tear down their walls, kill their soldiers, and take their treasures. →

Joker: "Ha ha ha! Prepare yourselves, Batman and Robin! The destruction of Nineveh is at hand!" Batman: "Oh no! We must warn the people of Nineveh, Robin!" Robin: "Right away, Batman!" Catwoman: "Oh, don't bother, my little kitties! The Lord of Hosts has already sent his messenger to Nineveh, and he brought a message of destruction!" →

Folks, here's the deal: Nahum three is all about God's anger over the people of Nineveh and their wickedness. See here, Jack, he brings his wrath upon them like a flood and they don't stand a chance. My father used to say, "God's anger can be like a storm that nobody can escape from. →

The haters and losers in Nineveh thought they were winning in Nahum 3, but boy were they wrong! This city was so overrated and had tremendous amounts of wickedness. The people of Nineveh were so deep in sin, it was unbelievable. →

Lois: Hey Peter, what's the latest chapter of the Bible? Peter: Nahum 3! It's all about Nineveh, the capital of Assyria. God sends a warning to the city that they will be destroyed because of their wickedness. →