• King James Version

    1. He that dasheth in pieces is come up before thy face: keep the munition, watch the way, make {thy} loins strong, fortify {thy} power mightily. {He...: or, The disperser, or, hammer} / 2. For the LORD hath turned away the excellency of Jacob, as the excellency of Israel: for the emptiers have emptied them out, and marred their vine branches.

  • Norm

    Well, it's been a while since we heard from Nahum, but he's back with a vengeance in Nahum 2. So, if you're in Ninevah, you might want to get out of dodge because God's not happy. He's sent an army of chariots and horses to lay siege to the city and they're coming in like a whirlwind.

  • Joe Rogan Experience

    Joe: Alright, what do we got here? Expert: Chapter two of Nahum is a prophecy of the destruction of Nineveh, the capital of the Assyrian Empire. Joe: Whoa. Is that true? Jamie: Google says it's right.

  • Jeopardy

    Alex: Alright, so tell me about yourself! Contestant: Well, I'm a huge fan of the Bible and I was just thinking about Nahum 2. Alex: (sighs) What's Nahum 2? Contestant: Nahum 2 is all about the impending destruction of Nineveh, the capital of Assyria.

  • Drill Sergeant

    "LISTEN UP, RECRUITS! Y'ALL BETTER BE LISTENING CLOSELY NOW, 'CAUSE THIS IS THE BOOK OF NAHUM, CHAPTER 2. YOU'RE GONNA HEAR ABOUT SOME SERIOUS PUNISHMENT GOING DOWN. THE LORD IS GONNA UNLEASH DESTRUCTION ON THE ENEMY.

  • Batman

    Batman: Robin, the villainous Ninevites have been stirring up trouble once again! Robin: That's awful, Batman! What do we do? Batman: We must prepare for battle! The Lord will be with us. He will take vengeance on our enemies and protect us.

  • Joe Biden

    Folks, here's the deal. Listen, Jack, Nahum 2 is all about the fall of Nineveh. My father used to say, it's gonna be a big one. I'm not joking - no malarkey! In the first verse, God says, 'the enemy is gonna march out of Nineveh'.

  • Donald Trump

    Nahum 2 is a bigly story of God's vengeance on Nineveh, an amazing and powerful city that was way overrated. It was full of haters and losers who did terrible things and now God is saying "sad!" and He's making Nineveh great again, if you know what I mean.

  • Family Guy

    Brian: Alright, so in Nahum 2, Nineveh is about to be destroyed by an army of God. Peter: Hey, isn't that like the title of that M. Night Shyamalan movie? Brian: Yeah, but this time it's for real. The chariots and horses are making a lot of noise and they're moving forward like the waves of the sea.